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How do I know if my child has a social problem?

What are the signs of a problem with my baby's social development? doesn't smile at others. can't maintain eye contact with someone else. looks away or turns her body away from others. cries more than usual in new situations that involve other people or unfamiliar places. More items...

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What is social development?

How can I tell if my baby's social development is normal?

(Meltzoff and Moore 2002, Sheridan 2008)

What are the signs of a problem with my baby's social development?

doesn’t smile at others

can’t maintain eye contact with someone else

looks away or turns her body away from others

cries more than usual in new situations that involve other people or unfamiliar places

blushes or has a flushed face and neck when in social situations

wants to be held constantly in social settings, even relatively familiar ones

is only happy to go to a small number of people

becomes tense and hot when with others

is hard to comfort when in social situations

What can I do to help my baby's social development?

(Schmitow and Stenberg 2013)

Take the opportunity to chat to your baby during nappy changes, dressing and bathing. Talk about what she's doing, as well as what you're doing. You can also talk about how you both might be feeling, to help her begin to make the link between feelings and behaviour. When your baby is happy to play, use the time to sing nursery rhymes with actions, play ‘round and round the garden’, or have fun with some peek-a-boo and tickle games. Not only are these are great fun for both of you, they also give your baby a chance to work on her social skills. Introduce your baby to varied social situations, ensuring that you're there as a safe base. Going for a coffee, trying different play groups, and joining music or baby signing groups will all help your baby learn to cope with unfamiliar situations. They're also the perfect opportunity for you to build up your own social network. Children don’t learn to actually play with others their own age until their third year (Hughes 2009) . However, playing alongside other children is an important part of social development. Give your baby plenty of opportunities to be with other babies of a similar age. By practising sharing attention, toys and food, she'll build important social skills that will be useful throughout her life. . However, playing alongside other children is an important part of social development. Give your baby plenty of opportunities to be with other babies of a similar age. By practising sharing attention, toys and food, she'll build important social skills that will be useful throughout her life. Eating is an important social event. Use feeding as a time for close physical touch and soothing chat. Once your baby is weaned, eat with her as often as you can, using mealtimes to chat and have fun together. This will help your baby to relax and therefore be happier to explore food. She'll also learn about what is socially acceptable at mealtimes, making future trips to the cafe more pleasurable. Pay attention to your baby's reactions in social situations and learn how she likes to be comforted. This may be gentle strokes, being held firmly, soothing words in her ear, a milk feed, or a comfort object.

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I sometimes feel awkward in social situations. How can I avoid passing those feelings on to my baby?

What should I do if I think my baby has a problem with her social development?

References Hughes F. 2009. Children, play and development 4th ed. London: SAGE publications Meltzoff, A.N. and Moore M.K. 2002. 1983, Imitation of facial and manual gestures by human neonates. Science, 198:75-78 Schmitow C, Stenberg G. 2013. Social referencing in 10-month-old infants. European Journal of Developmental Psychology 10(5): 533-545. Sheridan M. 2008. From birth to five years: children's developmental progress. London: Routledge Social development is all about learning how to communicate , play and build relationships with other people. Although this is a lifelong learning process, your baby's first year is an exciting and important time, when she'll be building these skills rapidly.When babies lack social confidence, it can lead to difficulties in relationships with carers, and also developing friendships later on. Fortunately, the majority of social development problems are easily resolved.Until she's about two, your baby won't need to make friends; you and her caregivers will be her main playmates. But even as a newborn your baby is learning social skills. She'll watch your face closely and may mimic some of your gesturesAs she grows, she'll begin to learn to communicate by making eye contact, smiling and babbling. Read more about the key milestones in social development You'll soon find that your baby has her own unique personality . So what is normal development for another baby, may not be normal for yours.If your baby is shy, for example, she may be more wary of new people and situations, preferring to stay in familiar places with the people she knows. When she does encounter a new situation, she's likely to need lots of cuddles and support from you. As you grow into your parent role with your baby, it's important that you let her know that you accept her for who she is.It's natural for your baby to experience separation anxiety at around eight months. It's also worth remembering that all babies have off-days. Most parents have experienced the disappointment of taking their baby out to meet friends or family and finding that she's not at her best.But if your baby seems anxious for a long time, or in a variety of social situations, it could be a sign that she's struggling socially.You may notice that she:Spend lots of time looking at and chatting to your baby. You’re her role model when it comes to social situations, so give her plenty of opportunities to learn from you. If you find that your baby is less socially confident than others, it's important to give her even more opportunities to try out different and new social situations.When you’re in conversation, your baby’s likely to spend a lot of time scanning your face, and the faces of other carers, family and friends. This helps her to make sense of the world, by trying to work out how you're feeling.The following techniques may help your baby to feel more comfortable around people:Even though your baby is looking to you for social cues, there's no need to try to act in a socially perfect way when you're with her. She'll learn a great deal about feelings and behaviour by watching you when you get it wrong, feel embarrassed and then manage your feelings.Social development is a two-way process. If you're shy and find social situations difficult yourself, try not to let this limit your baby’s experiences. Instead, find a way of overcoming your shyness, perhaps by taking a friend or partner with you, or seeking support online. Start off with short bursts of structured, small social gatherings, then as your confidence builds, increase the length of time and the size of the group.If you're feeling so low, tired or lonely that chatting and playing with your baby is very difficult, talk to your health visitor or visit your GP to get some support.As a parent, you are the expert on your baby. Pay particular attention to her eye contact, the sounds she makes, and any displays of anxiety in social situations. If you notice a consistent and marked difference between your baby and others of the same age, chat to your health visitor.You may also want to get your baby’s hearing and eyesight checked, as these senses are crucial to social development.Learn more about your baby's psychological development by checking out our article on emotional development problems

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