How do you know if you have a dull personality?

5 Signs of a Boring Person Negativity. Nothing is more boring than a person who always sees the negative side of things—a person who complains constantly. ... Superficial. The bore doesn't engage in deep conversation. ... Impassive. ... Self-centered. ... Predictable.

psychologytoday.com - 5 Signs of a Boring Person | Psychology Today Canada

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We’ve all known people who are charismatic: They seem to light up the room when they walk in. And, when you interact with them, you come away feeling good and energized. On the flip side are people who are bores: They suck the life out of the room, their conversation is tedious, and you can’t wait to get away from them.

Here are 5 signs of a boring person.

Negativity. Nothing is more boring than a person who always sees the negative side of things—a person who complains constantly. Every time you try to bring up something positive (“Don’t you just love amusement parks?”), the bore complains about it (“too crowded, expensive, dirty…”). Superficial. The bore doesn’t engage in deep conversation. Instead, the boring person talks too much about unimportant things (e.g., the weather), or repeats the same things over and over. It’s impossible to make any sort of real “connection” with someone like that. Impassive. Unexpressive, speaks in a monotone, doesn’t make eye contact, seems completely disengaged—this is a sure sign of a bore. Self-centered. Boring persons talk too much about themselves and show little interest in others. The self-centered bore holds the floor too long, is long-winded, and when telling a story takes forever to make a point. Predictable. Boring people are predictable. They use too many tired cliches. They agree too readily and too often, and they rarely express any strong opinions of their own. Bores can sometimes be overly-solicitous—they appear too nice, always complimenting others over and over again. So, is a bore hopelessly sentenced to a life of exclusion and loneliness? Of course not. Any bore can turn it around by developing better conversational skills—becoming a better listener, learning how to take turns effectively and not dominate a conversation, preparing stimulating topics or stories beforehand. In short, becoming a bit more charismatic. My friend and former colleague, the late Bernie Carducci, wrote a book called: The Pocket Guide to Making Successful Small Talk: How to Talk to Anyone Anytime Anywhere About Anything. He suggests that anyone can develop the ability to be a more interesting conversationalist—to develop, as Bernie says, "the gift of gab." To read one of his papers on the art of making small talk, click here.

See more on active listening and the dynamics and “how-to” of charisma.

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How can I be quiet and attractive?

The image of the strong and silent type is that of somebody who is confident and comfortable in his own skin. This can be very attractive, and project an image of security and assurance. Get to know yourself and the world around you in order to take things in your stride.

wikihow.com - How to Be the Strong Silent Type: 11 Steps (with Pictures) - wikiHow

This article was co-authored by Erin Conlon, PCC, JD . Erin Conlon is an Executive Life Coach, the Founder of Erin Conlon Coaching, and the host of the podcast "This is Not Advice." She specializes in aiding leaders and executives to thrive in their career and personal lives. In addition to her private coaching practice, she teaches and trains coaches and develops and revises training materials to be more diverse, equitable, and inclusive. She holds a BA in Communications and History and a JD from The University of Michigan. Erin is a Professional Certified Coach with The International Coaching Federation. This article has been viewed 250,389 times.

Article Summary

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Being a strong silent type is all about staying confident and using your body language to express yourself. Speak in a deep and clear voice, which shows you're confident and in control. Make short, meaningful statements when you speak so people know you mean what you say. For example, you shouldn’t feel the need to give long explanations about something you say, because you should feel confident in what you believe. While it’s great to show off your self-control and restraint, keep in mind that staying silent in some situations can make people think you’re distant or disinterested. To avoid this, use body language, like eye contact and smiling, to show you’re listening. Remember that you should still talk to other people if you’re a strong and silent type, like when you’re hanging out with friends or standing up for yourself. For tips on how to build your self-confidence so you can be strong and silent, read on!

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