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What are the red flags that a child will exhibit with possible emotional and behavioural problems?

Possible Red Flags Ongoing behavior problems at daycare, school, home or in the community. Hyperactivity or constant movement beyond regular playing. Frequent, unexplainable temper tantrums. Unusual fears or worries. Difficulty taking part in activities that are normal for your child's age. More items...

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The following list contains some signs that may indicate that your child may have an emotional, behavioral or mental health problem that needs professional attention:

Ongoing behavior problems at daycare, school, home or in the community

Hyperactivity or constant movement beyond regular playing

Frequent, unexplainable temper tantrums

Unusual fears or worries

Difficulty taking part in activities that are normal for your child’s age

Difficulties with concentration, attention, or organization

Withdrawal from friends or activities they used to enjoy

Strange or unusual thoughts, beliefs, feelings or behaviors

Getting ‘stuck’ on certain thoughts, activities or actions

Ongoing lack of energy even when rested

Difficulty in going to sleep, staying asleep, or waking up

Sudden outbursts or explosive emotional reactions

Prolonged negative mood and attitude

Frequent physical complaints with no apparent cause

Inability to cope with problems

Inappropriate or unusual reactions to others

Sad and hopeless feelings without good reason, that don’t go away

Avoiding friends or family and wanting to be alone all of the time

Persistent nightmares

Seeing or hearing things that are not real

Significant changes in behavior over a short period of time

Eating problems including eating too much or too little

Violence towards oneself, others, animals or property

Refusal to go to school on a regular basis

Ongoing decline in school performance

Deliberate disobedience or aggression

Inability to complete tasks on an ongoing basis

Opposition to authority figures and little or no remorse for breaking rules

Extreme perfectionism

Cutting or other self injury

Inability to make decisions

Extreme mood swings with no apparent cause

Speaking so rapidly that they are difficult to understand or interrupt

Unable to get along with others in most situations

Worries about everything, even minor things on an ongoing basis

Becomes easily bored or angered

Isolation, loneliness, and a lack of friends

Risky or dangerous behavior including: sexually acting out, recklessness, running away, setting fires

Feeling hopeless or worthless

Abuse of alcohol, and/or drugs or heavy tobacco use

Frequent outbursts of anger or inability to cope with problems

Obsession with weight, constant dieting, purging food or vomiting

Self-injury, talk of suicide or actual violence. **Important! If your child talks of suicide, or hurts themselves or others intentionally, get immediate assistance and do not leave your child alone! If necessary, take your child to an emergency room for a psychiatric assessment, or call the police for assistance if you are afraid to try to transport your child. This list is not exclusive, and sometimes the symptoms on this list can be brought on by major changes in a child’s life including illness, death or divorce in the family, a change of school or a move to a new city or neighborhood, or a new baby at home. At other times, these symptoms may have no apparent cause at all. As parents ourselves, we understand that it is sometimes hard to be sure if your child actually needs help and sometimes even harder to accept that your child may have an emotional, behavioral or mental health problem. These thoughts can sometimes keep us from seeking out the help our children need. One important thing to keep in mind is that mental health disorders are treatable and when young people are connected to the right treatment, services and supports they can go on and live happy and successful lives while managing their mental health symptoms. So trust your instincts and seek help if you think your child may need it! If you are still unsure and would like to chat about your concerns pick up the phone and give us a call today!

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Why is my 14 year old son so defiant?

Defiant teenagers often push against or away from people because they are hurting, feeling insecure, or scared of something. In teenagers, defiance often comes from a place of powerlessness and a feeling of not being seen and heard by the world around them. Defiant teenagers also tend to be angry.

Responding to Defiance: Strategies for Parents

Get to know yourself.

If you want your child to shift their defiant behavior and to accept your support, deal with your own upset and anger first. Do your own work by reaching out to a spouse, therapist, or support network. Then come to your child with a clean slate, as much as you can, ready to support them. Also, consider your own relationship with defiance. Were you a defiant teenager? Where did that behavior come from? If you can’t relate to your own defiance, you’re naturally going to judge it in somebody else. Practice humility. This will help you to better relate to a child who is defiant.

Hear your child out.

The antidote to defiance is relationship. Any time a child can feel like they have trust in their relationships, they will be more likely to pivot into changing their behavior; they feel safe enough in those relationships to do something differently. It’s important to note that a lot of this is up to the child to take that risk. What parents can do is open that avenue of communication and create an atmosphere where it’s okay for their child to say what they want to say. Your child might say things like, “I’m really mad at you” or, “I’m annoyed that you’re breathing down my neck all the time.” As a parent, don’t take the bait or engage in power struggles. Instead, respond with something like, “You know, I really hear you. That makes sense.” Be patient. Hear what your child is saying and acknowledge their experience.

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